My Husband Is the Best

Hello My Internet Journal Online readers.

My husband is the best man I know, besides the Lord of course. I really do love him. I may sound corny, but it's true.

Men get a bad rap sometimes, but not all of them are bad all of the time. I admit my spouse isn't perfect, but he tries damn hard. I have been let down from time to time, but he lifts me up in a way that only he can.

The most important thing is that he's a good person. Down to the core, a good person at heart. When you can find that in a man, you know that he won't intentionally hurt you or dog you out. That is a very necessary trait when considering a mate, in my opinion. And my hubby has it.

He is under so much stress and pressure at work (he is a high school special education teacher for the emotionally disturbed), at school (he decided to go to Law School at the age of 39), and at home (did I mention he is the sole provider of a wife, a 14 year old son, and our twin babies). But he is handling things better than I thought he could. He is amazing.

That's why I say, my husband is the best!

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

S

I Hate Halloween

Hello My Internet Journal Online readers.

I hate Halloween. Is it not a holiday where you celebrate evil and devilish thing? Why do people get so into it, and encourage and allow their kids to participate as well.

I was raised in a christian home, where Halloween wasn't celebrated. Instead we would have a "Harvest Party" at church with the other christian kids. It was fun. I never felt deprived at all.

But, now as an adult, I say, "I hate Halloween." Now it's for totally different reasons. I am a stay at home mom, and we're living off of one income. This is due to the fact that I have twin babies (Jack and Jill), who just turned 11 months old.

The cost of child care for the both of them would run anywhere from $450-$500 dollars a WEEK. And unfortunately, I have not found a job that would leave me with enough money after childcare and gas, that would actually be worth it.

Anyone who's cared for a baby knows the preparation and time it takes to get ready to go anywhere outside, and the production that takes place once you get back home and try to get settled in. My hat goes off to all parents, caregivers, grandparents, and child care providers everywhere.

Well, back to the reason why I hate Halloween. During this tough financial time, we don't have the money to spend for Halloween candy for the kids. I love children, and their costumes are just adorable. But last year, when I was working, we bought $50 worth of candy, and ran out before kids stopped ringing the bell.

I don't know where you live, but $50 could buy gas for the car for almost a week, pay the gas bill for the house for the month, buy half a week's worth of groceries, and the list goes on. And that $50 wasn't even enough last year.

So now I have to be a prisoner in my house, and don't answer the door for who knows how many hours. Or the other option is to spend money we really don't have for candy. Will we then be considered bad neighbors, cheap neighbors, or non-kid friendly. I won't make my final decision until Friday, but I hate Halloween.

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Nobody Understands Me

Hello My Internet Journal Online readers.

Nobody understands me. That is what my 14-year old stepson told me on my way back from picking him up at the train station. He just came to live with his father when he turned 12 years old.

He says life was much easier and happier when he lived with is mother. And it was. He was her little boy, and her baby, and his responsibilities were almost nonexistent.

Now he is 14 years old. He is on his school's football team, as well as an outside football team. So he has an extra practice after school 3 times a week, and football games on Saturday. And he goes to private school, where he gets plenty of homework and projects.

He also has chores that he is responsible for now. Not too much though. He has to clear the dishwasher, take out the garbage, wash his clothes and clean his room on Saturdays. So because of this he says, "Nobody understands me."

When I was his age I didn't have as much school work, going to public school and all. But I had way more chores. And my mother just had my baby brother when I was 14 years old. And believe it or not, I used to say nobody understands me too.

The truth is at 14 years old, nobody understands you. You have a view of the world that is unique, and specially designed just for you. It is so different from everything and everyone else, that it makes you feel singled out, misunderstood, and ignored sometimes. Believe me, I've been there. But things will turn around and start to look better soon.

Years later, when you look back, you'll see things weren't as bad as you thought, hopefully.

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Brinks Home Security Commercial

Hello My Internet Journal Online readers.

Has anyone seen the Brinks Home Security commercial? Are they for real? Boy, I need to be in advertising. These people have no clue.

They are advertising how safe their systems are, and showing you what they can protect you from, essentially. First of all, they have the potential perpetrator looking dead in ti the husband's eyes before he drives off to work. It's the morning rush hour, and the guys runs to the front door and kicks it in.

Come on. When will this ever happen. Most burglars don't attack in the early morning hours, especially right after the victim gets a good look at their face. And they also don't bust down the front door. If anything, they would pick the lock and sneak in, use your "hidden key" close to the door, go through a window, back door, or basement window. It's such an unbelievable commercial.

But in a conference room, far far away, some clueless, genius advertiser presented this idea, and they loved it. More power to them. I should be offended that they even want me to believe this was a possible scenario. So much for the Brinks Home Security commercial mimicking life.

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Repossession Stopped

Hello, My Internet Journal Online readers.

I am still debating if I want my car repossession stopped. At this point, my finances and credit is so screwed up, I fear it would be years before I qualify for anything "on time". And I blame myself, for the most part.

I've made some bad decisions, which I will never make again, but have to live with now. I never should have bough a second car. I am not rich, nor did I marry rich. We both work, and work hard. But now, since I had my twins last year, I work hard, but without pay. So that's why I am in a predicament where I'm searching for information on how to get a repossession stopped.

I cannot sell the car, because I owe more than it's worth. I believe they call this an "upside-down" loan. Once they do take the car and auction it off , I will still owe the remaining balance. Will they then try to sue me to get their money? Will my credit ever recover? Oh, and I almost forgot. We have a house in another state in almost the same situation as the car. So I am also trying to avoid a foreclosure. Yeah for me!

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Why Love Hurts

Hello My Internet Journal Online Readers

Have you ever thought about why love hurts? I'm not talking about the physical act of sex, or abusive relationships, whether they be physical, emotional, or verbal.

I am talking about those times in a relationship, where everything seems to be a battle. When you both get under each others nerves in the worse way. Those periods when it all seems like too much work, and you'd rather be alone (completely) during that time.

During those stressful times I have seriously thought about walking away. But then, I think start to perform my positive/negative mental weighing scale. And almost every time, the positives do outweigh the negative. And the few times that the negatives should have won, I remember the love.

So although when I ask "Why love hurts?", I'm not referring to actual abuse, the growing pains do hurt. But thankfully, it's not for long, and our love does become stronger because of it. One question though, if I never have to ask why love hurts anymore, is my relationship then perfected? Is that even possible? Anybody want to share their thoughts?

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Tired of Life

Hello My Internet Journal Online readers.

Have you ever gotten tired of life? Sometimes it just feels like you are running and running, but never get ahead. I feel like a hamster on the wheel in a cage, that will never make it to the finish line, because there isn't one.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not depressed or wanting to die or anything. I love life. I think every moment we have on earth should be cherished and enjoyed. It's just the fact that we are so busy with the day-to-day business of living, that we really don't experience life as much as we should.

It is those day-to-day things that sometimes make me tired of life. I would love to be on a beach in Hawaii right now, listening to the ocean and looking up at the stars. And I may be able to do that in the next two to three years. But that doesn't cause me to skip around the kitchen as I clean it up tonight.

My goal is to try and find a little bit of Hawaii in every day. This won't be easy, and I'm not even sure I can find it. But I will try my best, so I don't have to be tired of life, but full of life.

Until next time,

My Internet Journal Online

Repossession Help

Hello, My Internet Journal Online readers.

Repossession help, does it exist? They came to take my car this afternoon. Yup, the guy walked right up to the front door, asked for Jennifer Jones and told me he was there to take the Dodge from me.

Well needless to say, I was looking a mess, still preparing dinner, and the twins were getting in to everything in the living room. Well, I politely told the guy, that I didn't have the car, and when I did get it I would let him know. I then proceeded to close my door and go back to preparing dinner.

I said to myself, "That went pretty well." But it was too good to be true. Now I see a strange number on my caller id, and it's the other repo guy calling me from outside. He walsk up to the door and knocks, hard. But I ignored him. There was nothing left to say.

We have someone who took the car because they needed it, and in turn just took over the payments. But in these hard economic times, with two babies at home, and one income, that money was spent elsewhere. So, now I have to decide if I want to let them repossess my car.

We're only a year into the payments, and my credit is pretty much shot already. If they do take the car, they will auction it off, and I will be stuck owing the difference. But like my mother said, "Thank God there isn't a debtors prison." Once it is sold, they can give me a final amount due on the vehicle, and then get to the back of the line.

I haven't worked since I had the babies last year, and I owe just about everybody you could think of. Hopefully, I'll find a job soon that actually pays more than what child care would cost me for two babies. So much for repossession help.

Until next time,

From My Internet Journal Online

My Internet Journal Online

Hello, and welcome to My Internet Journal Online!

Let me start by introducing myself. For security purposes, and to protect the innocent, you can call me Jennifer or Jenny. I am a woman, a mother, a wife, a student of life, and I spent way too much time online.

With everything going on in my life, and the world today, I find myself wanting to express myself in so many ways. And I like the idea of sharing my thoughts with the world. There is only so much talking my husband, sister, and friends can take.

So that's why I started My Internet Journal Online. Some of my post may shock you, inform you, or bore you to death. But I appreciate each moment you spend with me. I consider myself lucky, and feel fre to post your comments and share your thoughts with others.